Crestfallen

Too tired, my existing heart drained out, can't speak or make a familiar noise; can hardly whisper. My voice so faint I can hardly hear what my lips tell. Noisy land is where I live, people coming, others going, all are running. Fuel is how they get their energy, some fest on sex and others feed on romance. Tragedy is a drive and I am sick bored of that old soap opera, that ancient TV frame. Life is a lucid dream, and apparently we all want it a tragedy. My mind is so annoyed it will explode! My mind is so annoyed it will explode! My mind is so annoyed it will explode! Damn it will explode! I can't take their noises any more can't take it no more, can't! What happened to peace? what happened to what we called "communication" where is the "comm (common)" and "uni (one)" in the way we connect with each other?! What happened to my family and yours? I sit here as I watch my home from a far, dark and open place, I watch the windows and the lights, late at night. I squeezed some music in my ears and watched. The sky above is so quiet, stars are still, but down here, it's so loud, so vulgar chaotic. I feel so distant and so isolated, like I don't belong.. Yes, again that old feeling. My difference is so great I can't find a resemblance between my fathers and me but the skin I am wrapped in. Who am I? Why am I stuck in here? Will I live? or will I die? In Sinai where I am at the moment, Lot of people died here long ago, now they live and love. Where am I? Lost in a fallen land, in a dazed community, in a flood of contradictions! So tired, Mind so tired, So sick of the lies and disguise. So sick of that fake smile in your eyes. Go away, I need to be alone, I am happy on my own. Just go, let me be, let me breath, let my eyes see. Don't bother me with memories of you, I have a future and I have a lot to do. Just go and don't come back, I don't need you to waste my moment as you wasted all my past. You taught my heart sadness and gloom while life is all about joy, and spring bloom. I go, no more lingering behind, I have a train to catch and I will not miss it this time. I hear the call and I will follow, I will leave you my robe and my belts, Hold me not, let me be, just go, I am set free..